Parents, I have a confession to make. I am the one whom has been tripping your small children in Toys R Us. Yes, I, using the spindly limbs gifted to me at birth, have been quietly sticking said limbs in front of your precious little darlings.

Look, they wouldn't hit the floor so hard if they weren't tearing up and down the aisles at breakneck speed, screeching and waving plastic weapons. It's a store, not a play area. Most times they don't need my assistance; they end up crashing headlong into displays anyway.

How would I like it if someone did that to my nephews and nieces? If they were up to half the screaming and crashing I see these days, I'd trip them myself. The gladsome thing is that it's been reinforced over and over that they are not to treat the store like a free-for-all.

I must admit though, it's a little strange to see them brooding over a toy quietly while other kids dash at each other madly with plastic maces and doll prams.

On a seperate note, I really, really, really love Legos. Why are you so bloody expensive, my sweet?